I missed Mass today

I’m skipping church today. I missed mass today, I know it’s not a good thing to do. The Eucharist, the holy sacrament, the Mass is the central part of faith and worship the mystic unity between God and humanity, heaven and earth with all the saints prophets and angels and ancestors. I love the Mass, so why am I not going today? 

For me there is such a thing as too much church, too much obligation and a very real sense of religious and spiritual burnout. I didn’t go today because I didn’t want to sing in the choir this morning I didn’t want to pretend that I’m good at singing in a tired and drained state.  I didn’t want to put on the happy grin of Christian fellowship and communion. I didn’t want the annoying small talk and the sensation of not being heard or listened to or that I’m annoying. I know I’m annoying I ask odd questions that on one thinks of. 

I love Christ, even as a spiritual eclectic and syncretic and a warlock witch, I love Christ and his church and sacraments I love the catholic faith in all its diversity. Sometimes it is best to come away from the community for a time. To commune with God and heaven in solitude and with the holy scripture of creation. To partake and receive Christ in the sacrament of silence, solitude and rest. To go to Christ in the wilderness of simple mundane life before kneeling before his holy and real presence at is glorious altar. 

I didn’t go to mass today.